Walt: Write introductions that orientate and hook in my audience
This morning in room 8 we made butter we put cream and salt in a small jar then when it was done we pulled out fresh bread then we got to put butter on then it was ready to eat.
We had to put a pinch of salt into are jar. Then when we put those two ingredients we had to shake the jar it took us like 12 min to shake the jar. Then when it was done it was ready to eat.
We had to put a pinch of salt into are jar. Then when we put those two ingredients we had to shake the jar it took us like 12 min to shake the jar. Then when it was done it was ready to eat.
I didn't know that it was show easy to make butter.
I agree your introduction is clear, we just need to work on hooking in your reader. Try and use some of the techniques we have been practising in class Montel.
ReplyDelete